As I saw my ex-girlfriend earlier today I've realized somthing, this break up thing is harder than I thought. I find myself longing for the affection and love that I had only a few days ago. I thought it would be easy to deal with since we were close friends before we started dating. Despite the fact that the break up was amicable I still find myself being somewhat bitter about it. It's nothing against her, but I sometimes feel that a break up wasn't necessary but obviously things didn't go that way.
What makes it even harder is the fact that it seems like all of my closest friends are involved in serious relationships and now I'm the single one in the group. I see them happy with what they have and I reflect on what I once had and I just feel like shutting myself off from the rest of the world. I just don't feel like being bothered with these dumbass questions about it sometimes. "FAM!!!", "What happened?", "Did you cheat on her?","You gone get on these hoes now?", "Did she cheat on you?", "What are you gonna do now?", "Are you OK?".
MIND YO FUCKIN BUSINESS AND GIVE ME MY TIME AND SPACE 2 THINK!!!
Excuse me if I sound irrational, I guess my emotional investment in the relationship it what's making me feel this strongly about the fact that it ended. And when I love I love HARD, though I may not show it 24/7 the feeling is still there, I did love her and I still do. I'm just finding it difficult to come to terms with everything.
NOW WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE??? I'm not about moving around with a slew a females just to fill that void because that's just ridiculous and female populous in San Angelo is disgusting and not worth my time. I definitely don't plan on getting back on the dating scene anytime soon. I have to get myself right 1st, whether that be with God, my future, my family, my friends, school, football, etc.
I don't want to be one of those ex-boyfriends that's all clingy because that's really not a good look. But it's hard not to be around a person that you've wanted to see everyday for the past 4 months. I wish the break up never happened but there's nothing I can do but accept the fact that it happened and hope for things to improve in the future. I guess I just have to give her the space that she needs to grow into the beautiful, smart and talented woman that I see her becoming...
What makes it even harder is the fact that it seems like all of my closest friends are involved in serious relationships and now I'm the single one in the group. I see them happy with what they have and I reflect on what I once had and I just feel like shutting myself off from the rest of the world. I just don't feel like being bothered with these dumbass questions about it sometimes. "FAM!!!", "What happened?", "Did you cheat on her?","You gone get on these hoes now?", "Did she cheat on you?", "What are you gonna do now?", "Are you OK?".
MIND YO FUCKIN BUSINESS AND GIVE ME MY TIME AND SPACE 2 THINK!!!
Excuse me if I sound irrational, I guess my emotional investment in the relationship it what's making me feel this strongly about the fact that it ended. And when I love I love HARD, though I may not show it 24/7 the feeling is still there, I did love her and I still do. I'm just finding it difficult to come to terms with everything.
NOW WHERE DO I GO FROM HERE??? I'm not about moving around with a slew a females just to fill that void because that's just ridiculous and female populous in San Angelo is disgusting and not worth my time. I definitely don't plan on getting back on the dating scene anytime soon. I have to get myself right 1st, whether that be with God, my future, my family, my friends, school, football, etc.
I don't want to be one of those ex-boyfriends that's all clingy because that's really not a good look. But it's hard not to be around a person that you've wanted to see everyday for the past 4 months. I wish the break up never happened but there's nothing I can do but accept the fact that it happened and hope for things to improve in the future. I guess I just have to give her the space that she needs to grow into the beautiful, smart and talented woman that I see her becoming...
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