Thursday, July 28, 2011
Miguel- Quickie
I'm people are finally discovering good music. This song is 5 years old, and he's just now comin' out with a video for this!...tsk, tsk, tsk.
Dog Days of Summer
Man, I'll be honest, this has been one of the roughest summers I've been through. Not even physically, just mentally and emotionally. The breakup and the my grandpa passing took a lot outta me, I'm not gonna lie. Dealing with the combination was pretty tough, but its getting better. When you get to the pointt where you've picked picked an engagement ring, and started a payment plans, and already planned out the proposal at graduation you don't just immediately get over that in a couple days. And I was at that point, had been making payments on it since April, that's why I was so broke at the beginning of the summer lol. Now had the break up happened after I finished all that, somebody would've had to call the laws lol. Realistically though, who meets their future spouse at 18? And it last forever? Nobody, that's who! lol I still have my days ,but they're coming less often. I'm just coping by staying busy. I've been burying myself in school, talking to my friends, working out, working, and even maintaining the bible study I've been trying lately. All of that makes it a lot easier to cope, its just a daily process though. I'm sure there will be some more times where I miss what I once had, but in the end you just gotta get over it.
What happened to me, happens to people all over the world every day. You just gotta pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep it moving. One day I'll be able to look back on this time in my life and realize that I was made a better man, person, father, husband and friend because of this. I say that because I've learned to appreciate what I have and no matter anybody says or what promises and plans are made, it can always be taken away. I don't know man, maybe if the two situations hadn't occurred around the same time maybe it would've been easier to cope with. I don't know, I'm just speculating right now. When I really look at the grand scheme of things, I really got it made, I've been blessed with no major worries. My situation is better than a majority of people right now; I'm a college-educated, intrinsically-driven, goofy, athletic, articulate, smart man with a bright future ahead of me. It's plenty of people that would switch places with me right now. But, yeah man, like I said before, I'm just taking it day by day and slowly but surely its becoming less and less harder to deal with...
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Grad School vs Achievement Through Promotion
Lately, I been kind of the fence about this whole grad school thing. As I've done an inventory of my requirements to do the job I eventually want to do I possibly can achieve it without breaking my parents pockets and spending 2 more years in higher education.
Its SO many internships available, so many to the point that I'm questioning the usefulness of a master's degree. Its even a spot available at the Bob Bullock Museum in Austin which the exact place I wanna end up. The only thing is I would hav to work my way up the ladder, but I don't have a problem with that, I actually prefer that. I say that because if I work my way all the way to the top, I'll know the in's and out's about everything and be able to perform my job that much better.\
I still haven't pulled trigger on anything right now, just contemplating my options. In all honesty, I could be anywhere 6 months from now, Austin, Houston, Dallas, Maybe even D.C. with some luck, who knows. I'm just gonna keep weighing my options and definitely pull the trigger by September or October. Whatever museum with upward mobilty wants to hire an intelligent, witty, intrinsicly driven, goofy, articulate, 22 year old, 250 pound, black man with dreads and gauges is definitely the one for me.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Two 1st's of today
Now we've hit once the biggest thing we'll probably ever deal. He has a baby on the way in a couple months. Due to the fact I have no child and won't have one for a while, this will probably be the closest I have to one, or a niece at least. As soon as he told me it was a girl I thought, "Aw hell, we gotta buy some guns!" lol...When those little boys start coming around they are gonna be in for a surprise...I'm gonna my best to be the best uncle to Nahla Janice Lott as I can be and I hope he'll do the same for me when I have children.
Another 1st that I experienced today completely surprised me. I picked up a bible and actually studied. I've been going back to church lately but the fact remains is, I've NEVER cracked open a bible on my own. One reason for that is kinda had issues with the way my religion was brought to me when I was younger, but that's another story and also the King James Version was always a little wordy for me.
The way it happened was a total accident. I happened to be cleaning out the trunk of my car and came across a copy of "God's Game Plan", a bible for athletes, which was given to me by our team chaplain when I played football for ASU. It piqued my interest when I came across it because I had been thinking about so much negative stuff lately, that I thought I should try something different. I took it back to my apartment and started to thumb through it.
Now what makes this bible different is the fact that the language isn't so formal and it's geared toward an athlete's thinking. It comes with several different way of applying different verses to different issues and explaining why they apply. That's a plus for me because before I kinda felt like I was reading certain verses because the pastor told me to.
The first lesson was about self-image As a warm-up we had grade ourselves on our temperament and I've noticed I'm completely giving to the ones closest to me but ice to people I don't know. The actual verse of the lesson was Luke 18:9-14, which discusses a Pharisee and a Tax Collector, in a shortened version the Pharisee is this exalted man but prayed to God that was thankful for not being like other men, but the tax collector who, at the time was oft-compared to a robber or murderer, simply asked for forgiveness. Later, only the tax collector went home justified. The lesson in this was that for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself is exalted.
For the first time in a couple I actually felt ok. I wasn't thinking negatively or selfishly. I actually went to work with a clear mind. I was thinking, "Dang, why haven't I been doing this sooner? If I would've known I my temperament could changes that quickly after 1 lesson, what would happen if I really got into this?" I just simply took a baby step in reading the word. And some people may take this with a grain of salt, but in all honesty I really couldn't care less about other people's opinions as far as this is concerned, this is MY personal thing. It was cool though man, a really refreshing feeling. Once I make through all 210 lessons they have in this bible I'll get back to you on where I am with it lol...I'll just take, 1 lesson, 1 day at a time.
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